Dear Child I've Been Dying to Reach You
by paintmyworld11
Summary: Bella was not over Edward, nowhere even close, but could she possibly let someone else in her life-- and love them? Jacob, Bella, and Embry the often overlooked character
1. Chapter 1

**First story in a long, long time. In fact, I found I am quite rusty :) I hope you like this regardless. Any kind of feedback, ideas, or ways I can improve the story or my writing are greatly appreciated.**

**When I Look at You**

_Everybody needs inspiration_

_Everybody needs a song_

_A beautiful melody_

_When the night is so long…_

I flicked my wrist and slowly turned the key in my ignition, cringing as my shabby, red pickup truck loudly sputtered to life, no doubt trying to gradually make me lose all ability to hear. Although, I thought as I drove along the familiar wet and winding streets, with vibrant bright green ferns and tall shadowy oak trees covering every inch of open land, losing my hearing might not be so horrible. At least I wouldn't have to hear _his_ voice anymore. It had been…4 months since he had made his grand and final departure from me, which inevitably ripped me to shreds and left a gaping wound in my chest that felt all too real; sometimes I even swore I could imagine it and actually _see_ it. Gaping, black with ragged, raw edges, sucking in everything it touched-- placed right over the spot where my heart should have been. Stop. I gripped the steering wheel tighter and sighed as I stared out my unwashed windshield at the bright blue sky dotted with minimal clouds, and tried to force my thoughts elsewhere. Thinking about him, or anything that could possibly remind me of him was risky and incredibly dangerous. Plus, I was on my way to Jake's and much to my dismay, he picked up on every little thing and could practically read my mind. STOP. Still too close. How many topics were safe to talk, even think, about anymore?

The sun shone brightly through my windows and for the first time since I had moved to Forks, I wished I had brought sunglasses with me, to keep out the bright glare that made it much more difficult to drive. It was so warm I probably could have gone to the beach or for a swim, not that I had a bathing suit—at least in Washington. And why would I? I knew right from the get go that moving to Forks would mean no more sun, swimming, good hair days, or ever being dry again. The bright day seemed to brighten my mood though and for that I was grateful. Finally, the familiar and incredibly comforting house of Jacob Black came into view, and as I turned off the engine, a flash of color in the woods caught my eye. My heart raced irrationally for a split second but I immediately relaxed when I saw Jake emerging from the thick dark brush of the forest, grinning from ear to ear, his bright white teeth glinting in the sunlight. As he walked towards me, I couldn't help but take notice of the way his russet skin stretched over his muscles when he walked or the way his short, inky black hair looked when the light breeze blew through it. I laughed, giddy just from seeing my best friend, and used all my strength to heave open my massive car door --that probably weighed more than I did-- slamming it shut once I found my footing on the crushed gravel. I walked across his lawn as he made his way toward me and the second we were in arms reach of each other, I was immediately wrapped in a huge bear hug that left me out of breath and practically crushed my bones.

"Jake." I choked out, struggling to fill my lungs with a sufficient amount of oxygen.

"Oh!" He said laughing to himself as he let go of me. His huge, heavy hands stayed on my shoulders so that he could steady me, if need be. Thankfully he knew all about my clumsiness and inability to stay upright and unscathed. "I always forget how _fragile_ you are." He brushed some stray pieces of my brown hair out of my face, smirking the whole while, obviously proud of his teasing insult. Being fragile, as he so delicately put it, was not something I prided myself on. In fact, I despised it. I opened my mouth quickly, a retort on the tip of my tongue, when a howl cut me off, informing me that there was in fact another wolf nearby.

"Who else is here?" Curiously, I turned around and squinted into the trees, wishing I had superhuman eyesight, like most of the people in my life. I quickly changed my line of thought, not wanting to think about superhuman abilities anymore. As I returned my gaze back to Jacob's eyes, I saw him scrutinizing my expression, probably wondering what I was thinking about. My eyebrows rose as I expectantly looked at him, waited for a response to my question.

"Embry." I felt my face involuntarily light up as a big grin slowly spread across my face, while Jacob's seemed to oppositely mirror mine, his eyes narrowing as they bore into my skull. An unfamiliar look flashed across his face and Jacob's usually dark chocolate eyes darkened further, turning them an almost coal black. Usually that was a sign of hunger when it came to the…

"Let's go see him!" I shouted without any warning, trying to disrupt my train of thought. My abruptness had startled him and I giggled slightly at the fact that I could make a werewolf jump. The smile stayed on my face, partially from the effect of being around Jacob and partially because I was trying to use my own interruption to my advantage and not think about eyes, either coal black or gold. A slight tug was pulling somewhere deep inside my chest and I knew I had to place my thoughts somewhere else, quickly. I turned around and once again, unsuccessfully tried to see Embry. Jacob's scorching hands were still on me, although they had fallen to my elbows, and they were almost restricting me in my effort to turn around.

"Why? Let's just go inside. You can see him later." His tone was suddenly defensive, as he tried to not so subtly tow me toward his faded red house, and I couldn't see any motive for his behavior. Had I done something to offend him? I dug my heels into the soft dirt as I tried to deter him from pulling me, especially without any apparent-- or rational-- reason. Although I felt a little guilty for whatever it was I did, annoyance was starting to seep into my body, mostly from his too hot hands touching me, and dragging me against my will, on the already warm day. Sweat started to bead on my neck from the combined heat of Jacob and the sun, and I pushed his hands off of me, immediately feeling relief once they weren't touching my overheated skin. The only reason I was so excited to see Embry was because he and I had become pretty good friends since he had become part of the pack. Jacob and he were practically inseparable, in the beginning, and since I spent so much time with Jacob, it was inevitable that I would spend time with Embry also. Although he was reserved, when you pulled him out of his shell, he was hilarious and his impish behavior reminded me a lot of Jacob. We constantly bet on anything and everything, and his up-for-anything adventurous behavior and spontaneity was exhilarating in a strange way. Eventually I not only sought out Jacob's presence, but Embry's also.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked, a little harsher than I had intended. Did he have a good explanation for not wanting to see Embry or not? His eyes focused on something over my shoulder, and finally gave a deep sigh, his eyes going flat as they made their way back to mine.

"Forget it. Let's go see him." He held his hand out to me in invitation as a tight lipped, slightly forced smile was pasted onto his face. We walked hand in hand, in silence, our feet sinking into the dry earth; the scents of dirt and moss slowly growing more and more apparent in the air. Somewhere nearby, birds were chirping and a creek was softly running, the water quietly bubbling. As we found ourselves right at the edge of the sage forest--where the flora began to grow-- a loud playful bark made me jump and I laughed loudly, even with Jacob's hand tightening around mine in an almost painful way.

**How was it? :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**AUTHORS NOTE:**

**Really? No reviews at all... Kinda disappointing :/**


	3. The REAL Chapter 2

_And I take everything from you_

_But you'll take anything_

_Won't you?_

"Um, Jake?" I cringed as I felt too much pressure on my left hand, almost to the point of extreme pain. I had stopped walking and we were almost inside the dense wooded area behind Jacob's house, the ferns and brush almost completely blocking us from outside view.

"Do you mind loosening the death grip?" I asked, gesturing with my free hand to our intertwined ones. Immediately, he dropped his hand and bowed his head, all of a sudden interested in the forest floor.

"Sorry." He mumbled. A couple small rays of sunlight managed to make it through the canopy the trees created, and they played with the color in Jacob's hair. It was almost dream like the way they were placed throughout the forest, animating the greens and browns of the wildlife and plants. The colorful hues stood out more than ever—especially with the ferns and moss-- and turned the setting in front of me into one of the most beautiful places I had ever seen. It was a bit cooler under the cover of the massive trees and immediately my hand felt too cool from the lack of contact between Jacob and me, which brought back my earlier concerns.

"Are you okay? You've been acting a little funny ever since I got here. Did I do something?" I asked as gently as I could, not wanting to upset him further. Silence enveloped us for a couple seconds, but just as he opened his mouth to say something, a swift gray wolf jumped in front of us, crouching down and swiftly moving its tail from side to side, in an obviously playful motion. A small giggle escaped my lips and I decided that Jake and I could talk later, when we were alone.

"Hey Embry! What? What?" I moved from side to side lightheartedly, slightly crouched myself, acting like I was prepared to fight the monstrous wolf in front of me. My feeble attempts to fake him out didn't even come close to working, and he just laid down-- crossing one paw over the other-- and watched me, his tail constantly wagging. The only sound that could be heard was the sound my feet made as they brushed against the spongy ground. "Want a piece of me?" I laughed loudly and Embry made a sound similar to a coughing bark, which I took as laughter.

If I thought Jake looked amazing with the small amount of sunlight peeking through the woods, then Embry looked…indescribable. His charcoal colored fur looked incredibly smooth and soft, and each little white spot that dotted his back was extremely evident and pronounced creating a unique pattern that caught my eye every time he moved. I turned to look at Jake—to invite him to help me take on Embry, only to find him walking away from us towards his house.

"Jake!" I yelled, "Where are you going?" I straightened my back and turned away from Embry, watching my best friend's retreating back, and in a split second he had pounced on me, pinning each of my arms down with his massive paws as he hovered over me. A big, wolfy grin was on his face, which was only about a foot away from my own face, and he was panting with his big tongue lolling out of the side of his large mouth. "Ugh! Embry!" I yelled, trying to scold him, but I was having too much fun and I was laughing too hard for him to take me seriously.

"You're lucky it's dry out today or I would have totally kicked your butt for getting me all muddy." I stated in a matter of fact way, looking straight into his large, intelligent hazel wolf eyes. He gave me a massive eye roll and snorted, not at all worried about my wrath. Finally, he lifted his paws off of my arms and sat down in a pile of fallen leaves in front of me.

I slowly lifted myself up but I stayed where I was, crossing my legs as I looked—_really_ _looked_-- at Embry's wolf form. He cocked his huge head to the side, clearly wondering what I was doing, and when I didn't offer up any explanation, he nudged me in the shoulder—almost knocking me down in the process.

"You know, you're a **really** pretty wolf." A low growl reverberated through the clearing and even though I knew there was nothing to fear, every hair on my body stood on end. I glared at Embry and I knew if he were in his human form, he would be glaring right back at me.

"What?" I challenged. "Werewolves aren't supposed to be pretty?" His answering look told me that that was _exactly_ the case and I dramatically rolled my eyes and sighed as I got up off the dirty ground. Brushing myself off, I answered,

"Well, I still think you're **pretty**, so just take the damn compliment." And with that I turned on my heel and made my way out of the forest and to Jake's.

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**Kinda short; sorry. More reviews, please? :/**


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